I’m still scarred by a childhood accident caused by my dad.
I'm the first to admit it: I have trust issues. Commitment issues. I haven't had a serious girlfriend in five years. And I ruined what I had with her because I was scared. Scared that the good feelings we shared could be taken away at any minute.
I think a lot of my problems stem from the time my dad shrank me. It was the scariest moment of my life, but to him, it was no big deal. "Honey, I shrunk the kids," he said. Like it was nothing. Like I was a problem you could just shrink away.
I'm very lonely.
How can I form emotional bonds with the people around me when I know how easy it is to hit a baseball through a window, accidentally recalibrate a shrink ray's targeting laser, and end up in a bowl of Cheerios?
The author as a child.
Disney
It took me years to build up the courage to even talk to a woman. Even when I was regular-sized, I felt like I was still shrunk.
And when I finally did fall in love for the first time, I sabotaged it. That was years ago, but the thing is, I'm still in love with her. I rode a bee for Chrissakes! But I can't reach out to the woman I'm in love with to tell her how I feel. Sometimes I stumble on her photos online and I'm paralyzed for the day. It's like I'm back in my childhood backyard, sleeping in a Lego brick, terrified of being crushed by a foot or eaten by an ant.
People say to me, "No one has the perfect childhood. Get over yourself." My dad literally swept me into a dustpan and threw me away. Try having a healthy sense of self-worth after that.
The author's father. He dressed like this every day.
Disney
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