Reviewers take on the so-called “Greatest Books” in history.
The Brothers Karamazov, by Fyodor Dostoyevsky
"A slow epic for the reader of yesterday."
"The characters are unsymathetic and the most tedious elements of the book are their long discourses. I gave up after about 300 pages.”
“I struggled up to about half way then had to admit that I found nothing in it either enjoyable or interesting.”
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The Great Gatsby, by F. Scott Fitzgerald
"Total s**t, be warned."
"It's even more boring than that thing of Steinbeck's 'Of Mice and Men'. Avoid it like the plague. No. on second thoughts, get the plague, you'll be out of your misery earlier."
"The secret is: the author was a drunk."
"*MAKES ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE WHATSOEVER*. I don't care about society standards that is completely ridiculous. That Daisy would even think of staying with Tom dates this book *HORRIBLY* at the very least and more realitically turns into *A VIRTUAL CARTOON*..."
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Madame Bovary, by Gustave Flaubert
“This book was so lame, it took me many years of putting it down and picking it up again to get through it. Why did I waste my time? Because all my cool literary friends just love it and find it sooo very deep... another book to be avoided like the plague. Most mystifying of all is that many people, even intelligent friends of mine, consider this whiny breach of taste a passionately real and pro-woman statement!”
“Every time I have to help a high-school student or college freshman slog through Madame Bovary, I find myself wondering why the assignment isn't a violation of the Geneva Convention.”
“If you have a choice at all, please, save yourself: back away from this title and none of your innocent brain cells will be needlessly killed.”
“I personally did not like this book. I had no objection to extra marital affairs but the pace is slow, the story line flat and the ending depressing.”
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The Odyssey, by Homer
“This is long and repetitive book. I felt like I read the same chapters over and over again. I just can't”
“Let me talk, for a moment, about why we care about "The Odyssey" at all: I DO NOT KNOW. Why has this poem survived?”
"I give this item zero stars, and that's only because I cannot take stars away from it. ACTUALLY, I have to give this item 1 star, which means "I Hate It," because it turns out you cannot give something ZERO stars on Amazon. So I am giving it one star but only because I am being forced to do so by the gods.”
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